I made promises over the year to keep this blog up and running but lately I’ve just been doing drive by posts. I’m doing one again on my birthday. I wrote one last year and the year earlier. Each year, it’s difficult to let the day pass by without reflecting on what I’ve learned about myself over the last year, but this time, I want to think about something that John brought to my attention a few days ago.
Currently, the celebration of this age means he would have known me for half of my life.
I wonder what I was like all those years ago. Actually, I know exactly how I was all those years ago because I have the blogs to remind me. I was this kid whose dad agreed to allow to work on John’s websites. My dad was very protective (I am his oldest daughter) and I had no social life. In retrospect, I’m extremely happy things worked out that way although I had to learn certain survival skills once I moved out. I love being who I am and spent the thousands of hours gaining a skill that I still use today. I was discussing a timeline of my life growing up online when I realized that today, on my birthday:
“I’m too busy living life to write about it.”
Every time I think about what I should blog about I realize it’s something that I don’t care as much about, like all those years ago when I first got a blog.
I don’t really want to share angst about beliefs, unfairness, relationships, weaknesses, disappointments, etc. I realized that as a kid it was easy to have people comment on posts that touched on those subjects because we all hurt together. However, at this moment in my life: I’m content. My life is fine. I’m not going to rub it in anyone’s faces about how great of a time I’m having because that isn’t the truth at all—absolutely isn’t. However, I’ve learned to let life be as is. Accept things I can’t change and work on areas that I can. I’m also not going to say life is what you make it because a great deal of us struggle unlike others. Most people don’t have choices, so we can’t say, you have a choice to get yourself out of certain things. With my experiences, I still think that:
I’m very lucky.
Very lucky to have met the people who have influenced my life and very lucky to have experienced all events that make me who I am today. I’m very lucky to moved from where I was to carry out things that were beyond my reach. I’m so fortunate to not be jaded with my experiences. I believe that if I ever tried to be absolutely honest about situations that I chose not to write about I’m sure you’d wonder why I still have a positive attitude towards people and life itself (definitely not an understatement). I think that’s growth. I think that’s what I love about getting older. I’m really happy to have lived this long and I hope that I’m blessed with more to come. I never want to lose my positive outlook on life.
Happy annual 25th birthday to me!